After "Fifty Kilometers of Peach Blossom House" was broadcast in the first season, the awkward social interaction between Song Dandan and young people triggered a heated discussion. Since the second season of "Fifty Kilometers of Peach Blossom House" was broadcast, Eric Wang has become the only guest who has been shut out by Song Dandan. The life scene with the nature of the workplace has been constantly enlarged under the lens, and the misplaced intervention of the concept of the order of the young and the old has finally staged a situation of "countless minutes of embarrassment" led by Song Dandan. The high-density stalk-making ability and variety scenes in Taohuawu are even compared to the replica of Flowers and Teenagers 2, which will once again push Song Dandan, as the focus figure, to the forefront.
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"Nine Minutes of Awkwardness in Peach Blossom House" was pushed to the hot search, and Song Dandan became the storm point of this embarrassing incident.
To put it simply, the second season of "Fifty Kilometers of Peach Blossom House" was initially made like a meeting for newcomers to the workplace. This season’s program not only involves performance appraisal, but even "democratic voting" to send the guests with the lowest contribution value to the uninhabited island.
The life scene with the nature of the workplace has been constantly enlarged under the lens, and the misplaced intervention of the concept of the order of the young and the old has finally staged a situation of "countless minutes of embarrassment" led by Song Dandan.
The high-density stalk-making ability and variety scenes in Taohuawu are even compared to the replica of Flowers and Teenagers 2, which will once again push Song Dandan, as the focus figure, to the forefront.
△ Image content: Song Dandan forces everyone to dance in groups.
Song Dandan’s condescending speech with elders’ color was criticized for "selling the old by leaning on the old", including the bonfire party arranged by force in the program and the social terrorism activities from women’s group dance to group dance, but there were also criticisms on the understanding of the intergenerational gap between Song Dandan and young people, the recognition of efficient communication, and the push-pull vague speech of other guests (except Eric Wang).
△ Image source: Weibo User Comments
As early as the first season, Song Dandan’s awkward social interaction with young people triggered a heated discussion. The appearance of Eric Wang this season exposed the social problems of Song Dandan and other young guests. Eric Wang, who has received much attention and controversy because of ipartment, can be regarded as a "model" with strong personal will and self-persistence. Since the second season of "Fifty Kilometers of Peach Blossom House" was broadcast, Eric Wang has become the only guest who has been shut out by Song Dandan.
Obviously, under the social norms embedded by the concept of the order of the young and the old as the underlying logic, it is not simple for the younger generation to balance truth and confront paternalistic authority in a discourse circle full of workplace meaning, but in a collective community basically composed of young people,Paternalistic speech and subjective intimacy can not simply be attributed to the intergenerational gap.
Transferring the truth and keeping it true
The real boundary in the collective discourse circle
In the collective community,Transferring the truth becomes a kind of safety fence for self-protection.
Song Dandan’s paternalistic speech and performance-oriented program arrangement made this variety show a career test. This also means that young guests are bound to face a difficult choice: one is to disobey parents’ authority but be criticized. For example, Li Xueqin suggested that everyone should not rob the job, and Song Dandan immediately refuted and criticized it after a reasonable division of labor; The other is to transfer one’s true thoughts to conform to the group norms led by Song Dandan.
Obviously, most of the guests chose the latter. In fact,In the situation of collective expression or even collective aphasia, surrendering the truth becomes the best measure to escape the pressure. By surrendering the truth, the guests create their own security boundary.However, the security boundary shaped by individuals themselves is weak and narrow, which can’t withstand the impact and blow from the top pressure, and even further encourages the overlooking from the top.
△ Image source: Weibo User Comments
Obviously, transferring the truth is not an effective and reasonable way of collective discourse expression.In pushing and pulling, it not only intensifies the contradiction itself, but also wears away the power that really dares to refuse.In the presentation of the program, the real voice needs two factors, one is the absolute authority and the confidence given by the authority, the other is the paid warmth and collective voice without the authority.
As an old guest who has participated in the first season of the program, Song Dandan is carrying a kind of overlooking psychology of "I have more experience", and her paternalistic authority and the intervention of leadership thoughts are more reasonable to promote the attitude of "I should lead the overall situation". At the same time, it is obvious that the newcomers who just met can’t gather quickly and form a consistent resistance strategy in a short time, which also makes Song Dandan’s voice more and more intense while other guests can only listen to the arrangement.
△ Image content: Song Dandan proposed to hold a party.
It can be seen that the group norms of respecting elders and giving priority to experience in the program have become a chain that binds young guests, and the blade behind it is constantly wearing away and consuming their true selves.
On the surface, it is Song Dandan’s criticism that makes others breathless.Behind it, it profoundly reflects the helplessness of other young guests in the face of paternalistic authority and the reluctance to surrender the truth and conform to the norms.
Some netizens even commented that "if it is quiet, it will be different."
△ Image source: Weibo User Comments
Through the embarrassing nine minutes, we can see,In the collective discourse circle, the real boundary always gives way to the existing social norms or those shaped and formed by others to a certain extent.As the only Eric Wang who firmly refused Song Dandan’s arrangement, he won the applause of other guests, but others still couldn’t escape the arranged bonfire party and group dance.
What needs to be broken from transferring the truth to maintaining the truth is not only the shell of self-protection, but also the iron wall formed by existing norms.
Fuzzy intergenerational gap
True paternalistic authority
Undeniably, paternalistic authority is vividly interpreted in Song Dandan. The unspoken "I’m good for you" is vividly presented in Song Dandan’s lecture hall on marriage experience and life principles.
In the program, Song Dandan tells his own experience, which is classified as inferiority complex. namely"People’s strong inferiority complex will make you very rude inexplicably, so when someone is rude to me, I think he must be too inferior."
△ Image source: Song Dandan’s inferiority theory
It is naturally inappropriate to discuss this truth out of context, but in the collective community dominated by Song Dandan at that time, some netizens could not help but put this truth in the existing relationship, seeing it as a way for Song Dandan to establish and maintain its own authority, and even slightly smacked of PUA.
For example, "Li Xueqin was rude to me, so Li Xueqin felt inferior".
Regardless of whether the logical transformation from "inferiority leads to rudeness" to "you are rude to me, so you feel inferior" is smooth or not, such truth and expression actually contain hidden authoritarian ideas and commanding consciousness.
When forming a new collective, establishing authority is the first task of such elders. At the same time, the formation of Song Dandan’s natural leadership situation also proves that the establishment of authority is unnecessary. In the "inferiority theory" she conveyed,I am also rationalizing my psychological burden and strengthening the personality trial of "inferiority" that the younger generation needs to bear for being rude to her.
This proves that,Long-term paternalistic authority has become a habit and a matter of course, spreading around like cells integrated into capillaries.
△ Image source: Weibo User Comments
However, it is obviously inappropriate to blur such behavior with forced guidance into an intergenerational gap. Even from the idea of "for everyone’s good",Song Dandan’s self-identity and self-dedication, which obviously bears the imprint of the times, will inevitably hit a wall in the social circle dominated by the younger generation.
For example, in the part of holding a bonfire party and performing a program, the problem is not only that singing and dancing is no longer the first choice for the younger generation to break the ice, but also the oppressive feeling that Song Dandan forcefully binds others together on the grounds of "group building".The friction behind this and the audience’s anger were not that Song Dandan proposed to hold a bonfire party, but forced others to participate in it.
△ Image content: Dylan, Li Xueqin opposed the bonfire party
If surrendering the truth is the self-protection and compromise of the younger generation in the face of paternalistic authority, thenIt is Song Dandan’s responsibility to build his own authority blindly in dealing with young people.
In the collective life composed of young people, it is the correct starting point to integrate into dialogue. Equating experience with life experience, and molding one’s absolute authority on this ground is actually to further widen the intergenerational gap, and also to throw off the responsibility that one should bear in integrating into the new social rules.
It is much simpler to simply export ideas than to change behaviors. Song Dandan chose to form a collective around himself by creating authority. On the one hand, he was afraid that the patriarchal ideology in the traditional concept would be impacted and his position would be impacted. On the other hand, he was afraid that he would be difficult to integrate into the collective formed by young people.
Obviously, the generational divide cannot be a shield for paternalistic authority, and the gap that has already formed also needs to be changed by the elders.
Light produces shadows, but shadows follow light. Listening and dialogue can win the recognition of the younger generation more than instilling stories.
△ Image content: Song Dandan criticized everyone
Beyond parental authority and intergenerational conflict
Can you spy on an intimate relationship?
Song Dandan’s speech drew the audience back to "Family with Children" overnight, showing a kind of intimate relationship between mother and child/mother and daughter that she wanted to build.
Song Dandan was given an intimate perspective on the childhood filter with children at home, but after too oppressive "doting", intimate relationship became another generation term of suffocation.
In such a dialogue and exchange, the oppressive and compulsory export of the concept of elders makes the intimate relationship give way to the superficial discipline and conflict.But what is undeniable behind it is the goodwill from the perspective of self.For example, the initial intention of Song Dandan’s proposal for the party was to quickly narrow the distance between the guests, but there was a deviation in the choice of ways.
△ Image content: The initial intention of holding a party in Song Dandan
Aside from the specific realistic situation, the original intention of the elders is naturally to consider their younger generation, but the misplaced background of the times and the embedding of role identity make the original intention of the elders distorted in the process of communication.Behind it also reflects a kind of intergenerational trauma that continues in society.
Intergenerational trauma refers to the trauma that is transferred from the first generation of survivors of traumatic events to their next generation or the next generation through the mechanism of PTSD, which is manifested in excessive control or the transmission of social norms and beliefs.
When contemporary trauma becomes a microcosm of the times, elders hope to pass on their own trauma in the process of growing up, resulting in a forced discipline and output. "Fulfilling my (parents’) wishes" is a simple manifestation of intergenerational trauma.Adding what you think is right or wrong to the younger generation blindly has become a way for elders to heal their own wounds but express goodwill inappropriately.
△ Image content: Song Dandan provides marriage advice to Dong Xuan.
However, the intimate relationship without the connection of blood and kinship in the program obviously cannot quickly run into the contradictions brought about by the intergenerational gap. The expression of intimate relationship will inevitably give way to the community with interest attributes.
This also shows that when the intimate relationship with self-awareness of elders is rejected, we should reflect on whether it is in line with the public interest in the process of establishing intimate relationships. Simply put,The intimate relationship formed by Song Dandan’s self-identity collides with the newly formed public community with interest attributes, and the already misplaced and untimely intimate relationship is more prominent in the conflict of interests.
The intergenerational gap is the product of the times, which is difficult to bridge in a short time, but changing paternalistic authority can make the communication of intimate relationship more open and direct. Breaking the parental filter of "I am good for you", the true colors of the younger generation are equally colorful.
(Image from the Internet)
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